I took the day off yesterday and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I decided that it was going to be a no-tech day—no cell phone, computer, texting, television, nada—for at least eight hours. Just me and the birds and the sun.
I woke up the first time around 7:30 and sent warning texts to my loved ones and colleagues to let them know that I would not be available for anything, but how they could break through my iPhone’s Do Not Disturb feature if it were a true emergency. Then I lay on the couch and simply listened to the birds. I must have dozed off because the next time I looked at the clock, it was 10:30 in the morning.
“I feel like one of those women that used to captivate me when I was a kid”
After some cereal and iced coffee, I took myself to my balcony wearing an over-sized tee shirt, flip-flops, and sunglasses. I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflection of the sliding glass door and decided that I look my thirty-five-year-old best. I saw my larger thighs soft with dimples and I loved them. I look like a woman who has lived and one has plenty of life and doing left in her. I feel like one of those women that used to captivate me when I was a kid—soft, maternal bodies, hair that equally stretches to the sun or demurely coils into an updo with bobby pins, quiet—not because they have nothing to say but because their words are precious gems that can’t be wasted with idleness. I am that woman.
I no longer care to have a twenty-year-old’s body—tight, defined muscles on a body naïve to time. I am proud of being this woman, in this time, in this body. It is a luxury gifted to me by the blood and sacrifice of my ancestors and all the women who could only dream of owning their own bodies. I know I’m not the only woman choosing to move in this direction. I look at my body and see Maxine, Velma, Beulah, and Denise. I am honored to be chosen to be one of them.